Owwwwww....

Heading into week 5 of my Facebook version of biggest loser and everyone's been doing really great..but HOLY CRAP am I sore!! Words can't even express how much easier this is for me to keep going every day with so many great friends doing it alongside me. I only lost 1.2 lbs this week, which to be honest...pissed me off. But as a group we lost 24 lbs! That's pretty freaking incredible.

Being the biggest girl in the group is hard. My percentages are horrible compared to those of the smaller girls and it can get pretty depressing..especially after working really hard during the week. But it just pushes me to keep going. I KNOW I'll get there.

I'm definitely addicted to my workouts now. I spend at least 90 mins a day in the gym if not more and I'm getting more conscious about what I eat. I think my problem is too many carbs and not enough protein..despite the fact that I've been eating healthier kinds of carbs for the most part. Something is still causing my body to hang onto the weight. So I'm going to change up a few things this week and see what helps. The biggest challenge will be having no sugar for the whole week. It was a challenge posted by my group and while I hate it...I love it. I know it will help me lose more and hopefully start a trend.

One thing I've definitely noticed a change in, even if my weight isn't changing much...is my self confidence. It no longer bothers me to be in a weight room full of strong, gorgeous men or skinny, beautiful women. Now instead of seeing them as people who are judging me...I see them as examples of where I'm trying to get. I want that. I want to look cute in leggings and a tank top when I workout! I want to have a butt that guys stare at when I bend over hahaha. I do!! So the people who used to scare me...now help to motivate me. I still have a long way to go, but getting out of the house to workout every day has really helped.

I really do think it's going to stick this time. I've been working out 4-5 days a week in the gym for going on 6 weeks now and I LOVE it! A year from now I'll feel silly for being so whiney and impatient about it. Now if only I had a time machine to get there.